If there is one thing that is notable about those that succeed in life and those that don’t, it is confidence. There is a general sort of confidence and then there is confidence that is specific to certain tasks.

Some people are just generally confident while others aren’t and some are only confident in specific situations, such as a dancer may be unsure of themselves socially, but when they step out onto stage and perform, they exude confidence at that particular task.

To become confident at particular tasks it takes repetition. Part of my job as a Royal Marines Commando was to teach other Marines how to abseil/repel out of helicopters 300ft high.

We would first train them in an old ships hanger on the dock. It was a long way down and in the morning when the first batch of Marines made their way to the dizzying heights of the hanger and out onto the ledge, I would be there waiting to attach the rope to their harness.

There was generally an uneasy look on most of the guys faces their first time abseiling from such a height into a wide open space. the feeling is vastly different to abseiling down a rock face. It is much more daunting.

At the end of that day everyone of them walked away feeling confident about abseiling out of helicopters 300 foot high. Why? Because that day in the ships hanger we would have them do that abseil over 30 times each.

As soon as they made it to the ground they would run up the steps to do it again. What do you think happened after doing this 20 times in a row? They got bored! When something becomes boring then you know that you are confident at it.

Anything in my life that I was afraid of that was holding me back in anyway from being all I could be, I made sure that I did that thing over and over again, until it became either boring or just second nature.

if we have a dream in life, something that we want to achieve, but feel that we don’t have the confidence to do it, or a lack of confidence is holding us back then here are three distinctions that can give instant confidence:

1. What we do with our body largely determines how we feel. We can all spot a confident person by how they hold themselves, how they walk and move. We can study confident people and then start to move like them and we will actually start to feel different.

Simply by standing with both feet equally and firmly on the ground, holding our head high, smiling and breathing deeply, will make us feel instantly confident. When we have had enough of feeling confident we can go back to hunching our shoulders, looking at the ground and standing weighted on one leg.

2. If we have  a dream and a vision for our life, but no compelling reason why we want it, then we will shrink at the first obstacle we encounter. A powerful and compelling reason will light a fire of confidence inside us.

To jump into a muddy flowing river and swim across may not seem appealing, but if our child was hanging off a brach on the other side of that river then there would be no question that we could make it across and save them.

So it is wise to make whatever is near and dear to our hearts our ‘why’. If we want to achieve some level of wealth and prosperity but are lacking confidence to take the necessary actions, then, we just have to look at how it will benefit our loved ones.

Take a stroll into the future and see how life has radically changed for the better. It is also a good idea to look at the possibility of if we don’t take the actions to achieve our dreams, then how will life look in the future for ourselves and our loved ones. It won’t be the same, it will be much worse, because if we are not growing then we are dying!

3. The third distinction is closely linked with the second and to achieve instant confidence it can be advisable at times to take our attention off ourselves and put it on others.

When I was on a  train the trainers course, we had to give presentations to groups as part of the course. A few people were nervous about this to say the least. I gave them one tip and that was to take the attention off themselves and to put it on serving their audience.

When we are focused on ourselves we are either thinking “look at me aren’t I great“, which is arrogance and will be picked up on by the audience, or we will be thinking “I hope I am doing a good job and that people like me” which is insecurity and a lack of confidence and the audience will pick up on that

It only takes a simple switch in the mind to achieve instant confidence by thinking “I wonder how I can serve my audience to the best of my ability“? The audience will pick up on this and love you for it. And that is instant confidence baby!

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